From 1eee39113bc65fdd923b9cf171d9ff436c194687 Mon Sep 17 00:00:00 2001
From: deuce <>
Date: Wed, 14 Jan 2009 06:13:46 +0000
Subject: [PATCH] JavaScript port of Blue Adept's Piss-o-Rama
---
xtrn/pisorama/pisorama.doc | 20 +++
xtrn/pisorama/pisorama.js | 330 +++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
2 files changed, 350 insertions(+)
create mode 100644 xtrn/pisorama/pisorama.doc
create mode 100644 xtrn/pisorama/pisorama.js
diff --git a/xtrn/pisorama/pisorama.doc b/xtrn/pisorama/pisorama.doc
new file mode 100644
index 0000000000..d13ccb0ff1
--- /dev/null
+++ b/xtrn/pisorama/pisorama.doc
@@ -0,0 +1,20 @@
+[Piss-o-Rama]
+ 1: Name Piss-o-Rama
+ 2: Internal Code PISORAMA
+ 3: Start-up Directory ../xtrn/pisorama
+ 4: Command Line *../xtrn/knk/pisorama.js
+ 5: Clean-up Command Line
+ 6: Execution Cost None
+ 7: Access Requirements
+ 8: Execution Requirements
+ 9: Multiple Concurrent Users Yes
+10: Intercept Standard I/O No
+11: Native (32-bit) Executable No
+12: Use Shell to Execute No
+13: Modify User Data No
+14: Execute on Event No
+15: Pause After Execution No
+16: BBS Drop File Type None
+17: Place Drop File In Node Directory
+18: Time Options...
+
diff --git a/xtrn/pisorama/pisorama.js b/xtrn/pisorama/pisorama.js
new file mode 100644
index 0000000000..d1264e4ee1
--- /dev/null
+++ b/xtrn/pisorama/pisorama.js
@@ -0,0 +1,330 @@
+/***************************************************************************
+*Please Read! PLEASE READ! Please Read! PLEASE READ! Please READ!!@!!@ *
+* *
+* The Piss-O-Rama *
+* Version 2.0 *
+* *
+* By: Dave Lahti a.k.a. The Blue Adept *
+* *
+* This is the Second version of the Piss-O-Rama, a favorite among *
+* SysOps who aren't afraid to let people see a "bad word" on their board. *
+* (And I say afraid literally. It is not a challenge to their machismo, *
+* just that for some reason they can't handle the word.)This version is the*
+* first to come out with Source Code. Version 1.0 was in Turbo Pascal, and *
+* I ended up not liking the final product. You will find version 2 much *
+* MORE enjoyable, I hope. Feel Free to send any comments or view the latest*
+* in Piss-O-Rama upadates on my board. I hereby declare this software *
+* TOTALLY public-domain. (Especially since I used skeleton.c!) *
+* *
+* The Blue Demesnes BBS *
+* San Francisco, California *
+* (415)-333-1982 *
+* Node 4552 of WWIVnet (For Now....) *
+***************************************************************************/
+
+/*
+ * Actually, this is version 3.0... now in JS rather than C
+ * Translated by Stephen Hurd (aka: Deuce)
+ */
+
+var game_dir='.';
+try { throw barfitty.barf(barf) } catch(e) { game_dir=e.fileName }
+game_dir=game_dir.replace(/[\/\\][^\/\\]*$/,'');
+game_dir=backslash(game_dir);
+
+/* Now, the Piss-O-Rama variables... */
+
+var dick_size=0, /* What kind of a punch he packs... */
+ arm_strength=0, /* Obvious, I hope */
+ will_power=0, /* How bad he wants to go */
+ beers=0, /* How many beers he has drank */
+ ptsleft=50; /* How many points left the user has */
+
+function piss()
+{
+ var phases=new Array("", "New", "Quarter", "Half", "Full");
+ var direcs=new Array("", "North", "South", "East", "West");
+ var speeds=new Array("", "Breeze", "Gust", "Gale", "Tsunami");
+ var sizes=new Array("", "Thimble", "2-Liter Bottle", "Gallon Milk-Jug", "55-Gallon Drum");
+ var attempt,
+ arc, /* The Arc which the user picks */
+ phase_of_moon, /* The Tidal effects on the piss-arc */
+ wind_direction, /* Hope you don't piss in the wind! */
+ wind_speed, /* If you are, hope it ain't going fast! */
+ temperature, /* The colder it is... */
+ bladder_size, /* How big the pouch be = pressure */
+ max_arc, /* Maximum Arc based on dicksize vs
+ * armstrength */
+ concentration, /* What's on your mind? */
+ playboy_factor, /* Random event causing physical disorder */
+ drunk, /* How drunk he is (affects aim) */
+ distance; /* How far */
+
+ for(attempt=0; attempt<=2; attempt++) {
+ phase_of_moon=random(4)+1;
+ wind_direction=random(4)+1;
+ wind_speed=random(4)+1;
+ temperature=random(100)+1;
+ bladder_size=random(4)+1;
+ max_arc = (arm_strength * 3) - (dick_size);
+ concentration = random(100) + 1;
+ playboy_factor = random(2);
+ drunk = (beers / 10);
+
+ printf("\r\n\r\n Status Screen For Attempt #%d\r\n\r\n", attempt + 1);
+ printf("Dick Size : %-7d Arm Strength : %-2d\r\n",dick_size, arm_strength);
+ printf("Will Power : %-7d Beers : %-2d\r\n", will_power, beers);
+ printf("Phase Of Moon : %-7s Wind Direction : %-5s\r\n", phases[phase_of_moon], direcs[wind_direction]);
+ printf("Temperature : %-7d Wind Speed : %-7s\r\n", temperature, speeds[wind_speed]);
+ printf("Concentration : %-7d Bladder Size : %-15s\r\n", concentration, sizes[bladder_size]);
+
+ if (max_arc < 0)
+ max_arc = 0;
+ do {
+ printf("\r\n\r\nEnter Arc [0-90] (Max Arc = %d) : ", max_arc);
+ arc=parseInt(console.getstr('', 2));
+ } while (isNaN(arc) || arc > max_arc || arc < 0);
+ distance = beers * 2;
+ if ((arc < 50) && (arc > 30)) {
+ distance += random(20);
+ } else {
+ distance -= random(20);
+ }
+ distance += will_power + beers;
+ if ((phase_of_moon == 3) || (phase_of_moon == 4)) {
+ distance -= random(20);
+ } else {
+ distance += random(20);
+ }
+ switch (wind_direction) {
+ case 1: /* North */
+ distance /= 5;
+ break;
+ case 2: /* South */
+ distance += wind_speed * 5;
+ break;
+ case 3: /* East */
+ case 4: /* West */
+ distance -= wind_speed * 3;
+ break;
+ }
+ if (temperature <= 60)
+ distance += (temperature / 2);
+ distance += bladder_size * 2;
+ distance += concentration / 10;
+ if (playboy_factor) {
+ write("\r\n\r\nSomeone threw a Playboy out on the field.");
+ write("\r\nYou get a stiffy. -30 your distance.\r\n\r\n");
+ distance -= 30;
+ }
+ drunk = beers * 2;
+ if (drunk >= 40) {
+ write("\r\n\r\nYou are really drunk, and it has affected your aim.");
+ write("\r\n -30 your distance.\r\n\r\n");
+ distance -= 30;
+ }
+ if (distance < 0)
+ distance = 1;
+ printf("\r\n\r\nYou Have Pissed %d meter(s). \r\n\r\n", distance);
+
+ var f=new File(game_dir+"best.pis");
+ var highscore;
+ if(f.exists) {
+ if(f.open("r")) {
+ highscore=f.iniGetObject(null);
+ f.close();
+ }
+ }
+ else {
+ highscore=new Object();
+ highscore.comment="Noone has beat the high score yet.";
+ highscore.oldscore=10;
+ highscore.oldname="The Blue Adept";
+ if(f.open("w+")) {
+ f.iniSetObject(null, highscore);
+ f.close();
+ }
+ }
+
+ if (distance > highscore.oldscore) {
+ write("\r\n\r\nYou Got The High Score!\r\n\r\n");
+ write("Please Enter A Comment:\r\n");
+ highscore.comment=console.getstr('',159);
+ if(user.name==undefined || user.name=='') {
+ write("Please Enter Your Name: ");
+ highscore.oldname=console.getstr('',40);
+ }
+ else
+ highscore.oldname=user.name;
+ highscore.oldscore=distance;
+ if(f.open("w+")) {
+ f.iniSetObject(null, highscore);
+ f.close();
+ }
+ }
+ write("\r\n\r\nCurrent High Score : \r\n");
+ printf("%s pissing in at %d meters!\r\n\r\n", highscore.oldname, highscore.oldscore);
+ printf("He had This to say about his victory:\r\n%s\r\n", highscore.comment);
+
+ console.pause();
+
+ }
+}
+
+function edit(ask)
+{
+ write("[Enter #]: ");
+ var ret = parseInt(console.getstr('', 3));
+ if ((ret >= 0) && (ret <= ptsleft)) {
+ if(isNaN(ret))
+ ret=0;
+ ptsleft -= ret;
+ return (ret);
+ } else {
+ if ((ret < 0) && ((ret * -1) < ask)) {
+ ptsleft += (ret * -1);
+ return (ret);
+ } else {
+ writeln("");
+ return (0);
+ }
+ }
+}
+
+
+function mainmenu()
+{
+ var ch;
+ var ab=false;
+ do {
+ console.clear();
+ writeln("");
+ writeln("");
+ write(" Piss-O-Rama - Main Menu\r\n\r\n");
+ printf(" Points Left : %d\r\n\r\n", ptsleft);
+ printf(" D)ick Size (Currently %-2d)\r\n", dick_size);
+ printf(" A)rm Strength (Currently %-2d)\r\n", arm_strength);
+ printf(" W)ill Power (Currently %-2d)\r\n", will_power);
+ printf(" B)eers (Currently %-2d)\r\n", beers);
+ write(" P)iss\r\n");
+ write(" I)nstructions\r\n");
+ write(" Q)uit to the BBS\r\n\r\n");
+ write("Your Command : ");
+ ch = console.getkeys("QIPBWAD");
+ switch (ch) {
+ case 'Q':
+ ab = true;
+ break;
+ case 'D':
+ write("\r\n\r\nInput Integer to Add to Dick Size. (negative to subtract)\r\n");
+ dick_size += edit(dick_size);
+ break;
+ case 'A':
+ write("\r\n\r\nInput Integer to Add to Arm Strength. (negative to subtract)\r\n");
+ arm_strength += edit(arm_strength);
+ break;
+ case 'W':
+ write("\r\n\r\nInput Integer to Add to Will Power. (negative to subtract)\r\n");
+ will_power += edit(will_power);
+ break;
+ case 'B':
+ write("\r\n\r\nInput Integer to Add to Beers. (Negative to subtract)\r\n");
+ beers += edit(beers);
+ break;
+ case 'P':
+ piss();
+ ab = true;
+ break;
+ case 'I':
+ write("\r\n\r\n Instructions for Piss-O-Rama");
+ write("\r\n\r\n");
+ write(" Ok, in this game, the object is to piss as far as you can. There are\r\n");
+ write(" several factors which can alter your performance. Four of them are\r\n");
+ write(" configurable by you. They are:\r\n");
+ write("\r\n");
+ write(" Dick Size - The heavier the meat, the more punch it packs.\r\n");
+ write(" Arm Strength - If less than dick size, you won't get a good arc.\r\n");
+ write(" Will Power - How bad you need/want to go.\r\n");
+ write(" Beers - The more you drink, the more you gotta go. Be careful,\r\n");
+ write(" it can affect your aim.\r\n");
+ write(" Arc - The Arc you choose to piss at.\r\n");
+ writeln("");
+ console.pause();
+ writeln("");
+ write(" Now, there are several features which are random on every try , of\r\n");
+ write(" which you get three per run. They are:\r\n");
+ writeln("");
+ write(" Phase of the moon - The tidal effects on your urination.\r\n");
+ write(" Wind Direction - Hope you aren't pissing in the wind.\r\n");
+ write(" Wind Speed - If you are, hope it isn't blowing hard.\r\n");
+ write(" Temperature - The colder it is, the worse you have to go.\r\n");
+ write(" Bladder Size - Bigger Bladder = More Pressure.\r\n");
+ write(" Concentration - Is your mind on this, or how badly you have to go #2?\r\n");
+ write(" Playboy Factor - A Random event causing a physiological disorder.\r\n");
+ write(" Drunkeness - Depends on the Beers variable, and can affect aim.\r\n");
+ writeln("");
+ writeln("");
+ write(" You start out with 50 points, so use them wisely.\r\n");
+ writeln("");
+ writeln("");
+ writeln("");
+ console.pause();
+ break;
+
+
+ }
+ } while (!ab);
+}
+
+/*
+ * If we're running under jsexec, fake it!
+ */
+if(this.console==undefined) {
+ console=new Object();
+ console.clear=function() { write("\x0c"); };
+ console.getstr=function(dflt, maxlen) {
+ return(readln().substr(0,maxlen));
+ };
+ console.pause=function() {
+ write("[Hit Enter]");
+ readln();
+ write("\b \b\b \b\b \b\b \b\b \b\b \b\b \b\b \b\b \b\b \b\b \b");
+ };
+ console.getkeys=function(str) {
+ var ret;
+
+ str=str.toUpperCase();
+ while(1) {
+ ret=readln().toUpperCase();
+ if(ret.length > 1)
+ continue;
+ if(str.indexOf(ret)!=-1)
+ return(ret);
+ }
+ };
+ console.attributes=0;
+ console.write=function(str) {
+ /* Strip CTRL-A, ANSI, and CTRL characters except tab, \r, and \n */
+ write(str.replace(/\x01./g,'').replace(/\x1b\[[\x30-\x3f]*[\x20-\x2f]*[\x40-\x7e]/g,'').replace(/[\x00-\x06\x0b\x0e-\x1f]/g,''));
+ }
+ console.writeln=function(str) {
+ /* Strip CTRL-A, ANSI, and CTRL characters except tab, \r, and \n */
+ writeln(str.replace(/\x01./g,'').replace(/\x1b\[[\x30-\x3f]*[\x20-\x2f]*[\x40-\x7e]/g,'').replace(/[\x00-\x06\x0b\x0e-\x1f]/g,''));
+ }
+}
+
+console.clear();
+writeln("");
+writeln("");
+writeln("");
+write(" As you pull down your zipper, you enter....\r\n\r\n");
+write(" The Piss-O-Rama!\r\n");
+write(" Version 2.0\r\n\r\n");
+write(" By: The Blue Adept #1@4552\r\n\r\n\r\n");
+console.pause();
+mainmenu();
+console.clear();
+writeln("");
+writeln("");
+write("Thanks for Playing the Piss-O-Rama!\n\n");
+
--
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